Dorothy's Page

Welcome to my page. Instead of a general page like everyone else, I would like to write about my role as Isaac's mom.

Many years ago I used to watch a show called St Elsewhere. The show was a hit in the 1980's and centered around the activities of St Eligius Hospital.

(Visit the St. Elsewhere website)

The series accurately reflected the teaching hospital environment. As a nurse, I faithfully watched each week. One of the most compelling minor storylines of the show was that of the Westphall Family. Dr. Westphall was an attending physician at St Eligius. He would come home after a long day at work to his family. His son, Tommy was autistic. Season after season, we would have glimpses into the dynamics of the Westphall family trying to cope with Tommy's condition. I can remember watching the show and specifically asking God never to give me an autistic child. I reasoned that I could handle anything other disability or illness. Anything but autism. I couldn't imagine how someone could live the lives of the Westphall's for real.

(Ed Flanders played Donald Westphall on St. Elsewhere)

In 1996 Isaac was diagnosed with autism.

The one thing I had prayed my child would never have was the one thing he did have.

I knew life would not be easy for us. It hasn't been. I spent over 2 years working at the Manitoba Developmental Center in Portage La Prairie Manitoba. MDC is a institution housing over 600 people with developmental delays. I had seen severe cases of autism. I also knew a savant. Who knew where Isaac would land on the spectrum.

I also knew of the prejudice and cruelty that would be directed towards Isaac and our family. In the 1950's "refrigerator mother's" were blamed for childhood autism. Although I have not seen it PBS, has recently showed a documentary on the subject.

Refrigerator Mother's

Bruno Bettelheim, promoted this theory and in the process, harmed many families. His story is told in The Creation of Dr B.

The Creation of Dr B., book on Barnes & Noble site. Also see The Creation of Dr B. on Salon.com.

Somehow it is "okay" for a child with a heart condition to have meds but a child with a condition involving the brain is supposed to just tell his body to act better. Last time I checked hearts and brains were both body parts that could have dysfunctions.

Nothing is easy for our family. There are only certain places we can go. Simple mundane tasks are complex. Even attending church isn't simple.

As he became older, it was hard to find a church to attend that had a special needs ministry. I prayed long and hard for an answer. First Church of the Nazarene in Bradenton was the answer to my prayers. I am now into my forth year attending that church. They set up a volunteer pool for Isaac for the first couple of years so that he could attend Wednesday night services. Last year, they started a special needs class room during church time so that those of us with kids who can not attend a regular children's church class will have a place to go.

I do not know why Isaac is autistic. But I know he is that way for a reason. There are verses in John 9 that many of the parents of disabled children hold dear to their hearts.

And as He passed by He saw a man blind from birth. And His disciples asked him saying "Rabbi who sinned this man or his parents, that he should be born blind?' Jesus answered, "It was neither that this man sinned or his parents but it was in order that the works of God might be displayed in him" John 9:1-3

I know that God has a plan for Isaac and our family. There has to be a reason I received the one thing I asked never to have.

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